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I guess...


This is a sad day in my life. I’m depressed. At an all time low. And I don’t really know how I’ll bounce back to life…any life. Or even whether I ever can bounce back.

I allowed the mundane, the ordinary and the unexciting to keep me away from the biggest hug in the world. I did not say HEJ and I’m now doomed to be reminded every single day of my miserable life that I wasn’t there when history took crowded shape.

I wasn’t there when thousands of people responded to a Swedish Invitation and decided to re-model their lives. With accessories from the world famous and Iconic IKEA. Forget the towel, the hanger, the doormat and the pillow cover that I did not buy. Forget the fact that the corner stand was made as if just for me in that special shade of white. Forget even the fact that I couldn’t sample their balls…veg or chicken. I wasn’t even part of the crowd that was sent back when they shut shop.

Becoming in the history of Hyderabad, the first ever establishment that shut shop within a few hours of its opening.

The psychological scars that have been etched onto me are already showing. My wife just turned the other way and mumbled something about having made a mistake all those years back when we got married. My children restarted a discussion about their rights to choose their parents…at least the father. My dogs, who normally are more forgiving, decided to sleep in any other room but mine. I have a feeling that servants and associates will be absent today from work, unable to digest the fact that I did not make it to IKEA yesterday.

I am unable to come to terms with a city that dropped everything they had and dedicated a full day to visit what is nothing but a humongous godown of mass produced items. Of stuff that hasn’t been tested in the Indian environ. Hasn’t been subjected to the maintenance torture of Osaye Ramulamma. And hasn’t even imagined the consequence of losing their individuality at the altar of custom made furniture and furnishings.

How do I explain to them that I do not want my house to look like a catalog of knick-knacks that I picked up from an inflated ‘dollar’ store. That I still doubt whether chip board can withstand normal Indian wear’n tear.


I for one, who is averse to being part of a crowded entry line even at a temple, will resist the temptation of becoming a goat and desist from the journey towards slaughter. Maybe one day, in the near future, when IKEA settles down into not drawing the attention of typically election campaign mobs who congregate wherever there is free Biryani and maybe a beer…maybe I’ll drop by at India’s largest godown-store. And maybe there I’ll bump into my old friend Ramulu who ran away from his house when his wife accused him of having a bad taste in towel racks…or was it the spoons she didn’t like?

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