It all started a few weeks ago when the Pav Bhaji and Pani Puri walla who operates near my house told my man Friday that he was introducing Vada Pav as well. I was ecstatic and told my man to get me some the moment they were launched.

Naturally I got first taste of the creation. And I was shattered. Disappointed…would be putting it too mildly. What the Bhayya had done, was to slice a Pav Bhaji Pav into half, and stuffed the gap with some kind of a cutlety tikka…shoved in some onion rings and a bit of his tangy tamarind sauce.

Blasphemy!!! I said to my man, and told him to inform the Bhayya that this was not a Vada Pav and that he could not hope to sell it under that name even to ignorant Hyderabadis. The Bhayya sent me back a message saying…Sir…everybody else loves it

When I told him that any self respecting Mumbaikar or any one who’d had the real thing would take objection to his sandwich being called Vada Pav…he had the audacity to say…Bet???

Naturally I said yes, sure…Bet!!!

So a few gentlemen and ladies were called by the two of us…I called a few of my foody friends and he called some country cousins. Unfortunately the numbers matched, so we landed up in a kind of a stalemate. We decided that we’d take it up again a few days later…this matter of what exactly an authentic Vada Pav should look and taste like.

While I was collecting material from You Tube and trying to import Vada Pavs from Mumbai, my Pav Bhaji walla called in the goon squad.

Apparently, the Pav Bhaji walla was due to them, a few thousands…and he was hoping to repay them from the money we had bet, and money that he hoped to win. What he told them was simple…prove to me that his brand of Vada Pav was also authentic….and they could collect their moneys and some extra as well.

So they tried…all of them…my Pav Bhaji walla, his family…his goons…all…but in front of my evidence and a lot of my friends they couldn’t prove anything, and eventually they lost.

So the Pav Bhaji walla was back to Square One.

The goons made him an offer that he couldn’t refuse. Use his connections in Mumbai and swing a sweet cricketing deal…and they would ‘maaf karo’ his dues.

So my Pav Bhaji walla called his Chacha in Mumbai…who used to sell Pav Bhaji, Bhelpuri etc. in Mumbai…and asked for his help.

The Chacha said he didn’t know any cricketers personally but he did know Dara Singh’s son who used to come to the same Akhada as him a few years back. So Vindoo Singh was contacted…and he stepped into the ring, so to speak.

He threatened Sreesanth…and in lieu of a demo, he took a towel, immersed it in water…and then proceeded to squeeze it dry…the inference being that…buddy Sreesanth…if you don’t play ball, you will be squeezed like this, till your life oozes out.

Poor Sreesanth…he misunderstood Vindoo…so he thought that he was supposed to wring a towel on the grounds in the middle of a match. This he did, quite innocently…with a towel taken from the hotel.

And before he knew it, there was a whole contingent of policemen outside his door…and he was arrested for towel wringing in full public view.

Now my Pav Bhaji walla is worried. What Saheb…he asked me…will I also be in trouble…

Though I assured him that the chances of the police tracing him to Hyderabad were remote…he decided to take precautionary steps…he has just gone and spoken to Sachin and convinced him to give testimony and model in an ad for…

his Vada Pavs!!!