Over the years I have come to terms with the fact that nearly all newspapers exaggerate their circulation figures. Some do it within the limits of credibility and some indulge in wild fantasies.

And the phenomenon gets funnier when it comes to magazines printed at local printers where we get a lot of work done. The total print run for such and such magazine was 3000 we are informed when the publisher is touting about 30 000 as his circulation.

But this blatant lying is fairly common knowledge for those in the business. Many years ago I had an experience with circulation that left me, to use a modern phrase ROFL (Rolling On the Floor Laughing).

There used to be a newspaper called NEWSTIME. A wonderful, literary treat, it was published by the Eenadu Group. I was a regular contributor and was quite happy with the Rs. 200/- cheques that used to arrive promptly by mail, no questions asked. Needless to say I was also a subscriber.

One morning, at about 630 I received a call from my friend’s father who is a wonderful old man and a gifted writer. Vijay, he told me after ascertaining the fact that I had been awake for sufficiently long to be coherent, I have written an article that got published in today’s Newstime. Please, when you are more awake, do pick up a copy and give me your feedback.

Since I was a Newstime subscriber I already had the paper at home and it took me but a few seconds to find his article and just a few minutes later I was back on the phone with him, thanking him for his kind mention of me in his piece.

He was amazed at the speed of my response. And when I confessed that I was a subscriber, he pronounced that from that day on, he would officially say there were at least two subscribers to Newstime. Him and me.

Mind you the official figure being quoted by the Eenadu Group was a few thousands. But in retrospect, after having witnessed the sad closing down of the paper I am inclined to believe that my friend’s father was closer to the truth than he realised.

As for my wife, she thought it was one of my better investments. I invested in the subscription amount which was less than Rs. 100/- per month and I used to get a minimum of six Rs. 200/- cheques every month for my writing. QED.